The Lounge Q+A: Alyssa Worrell, Life Coach

Full disclosure, I’m a mother of two toddlers, so I’m just going to completely open the kimono as we talk about the work that you’re doing. Where did this all begin for you?

First of all, it’s my sister and myself. I’m the co-founder with my sister, Andrea Ferguson Peterson. MWI, Mothering With Intention, started on behalf of our mom, who we always say had a powerful journey of breast cancer, not just once, but twice. So she gave us such a different experience. I know some people are like what? But we had such a different experience with it that our perspective is always the glass is always half full, no matter what. So we always say probably our insight and looking at things in terms of breast cancer and having a parent transition is a bit different, but we knew that our experience as kids was very unique, and we wanted that same experience for our kids, but she wasn’t there.

So we’re like okay, listen, we have got to make this something amazing. We knew we wanted it to be different and so we figured, hey, let’s just jump in. We knew that we couldn’t be the only moms out there trying to figure this out and wanting this amazing experience for our kids, so we just started. One day, I went to another mom event and I was like wait a minute. I need this right now. So literally, we started with something called “StoryTimeForMoms” and it’s still happening. We’ll start back up in February, because we take breaks because we’re moms. We’re not doing the extra, super, CEO schedule. So moms love our schedule. Let me tell you what it is first. I get so excited. But it’s a 20-minute call because moms are busy. Okay, it’s a hit it and get it. It’s a powwow. We really feature the aha moment. It’s about the aha moment of parenting. That’s really what it is. First of all, we start it with a party. Obviously, you can tell I’m the one with the blue hair. Oh my God and it’s a genuine party because what mom that you know literally can stop for 20 minutes for her alone, right?

So we’re excited. The moms are coming on the line. We’re calling everybody’s name like they’re on the red carpet. We’re excited. My sister always has to calm me down. That happens for two minutes and then she comes on. She introduces. We tell our story as to why we started it, which I just shared with you. Then we either have a celebrity guest. I mean, we’ve had movie stars. We’ve had CNN anchors. We’ve had what we call regular moms who we think are the superstars anyway. We’ve had actresses. If you go on our website, you’ll be able to see some of the people that have come on just to tell their story. What’s amazing is I don’t care how famous they are or whatever, the bottom line which makes us so unique is that at the end of the day, we’re all moms, right?

I don’t care if you’re Japanese or Indonesian. You have got to think about it. If somebody is putting down your kid, it’s going to sound the same in Indonesia, Japanese, and Englsh. Our heads may be moving differently, but we’ll all feel what she’s saying. So that all happens in a culminated call of 19 minutes, 59 seconds where they share that moment. It is so powerful. Then at the end, I come behind and I just do an encouraging, “Hey, listen, we can do this. We got this.” 20 minutes, we’re off the call.

So the schedule, of course, is a mom’s schedule. We always say, “Hey guys, we won’t be on long because this is my birthday,” or, “It’s Andrea’s birthday,” or, “It’s our kid’s birthday,” or, “It’s Father’s Day.” They’re like, “Yes, I’m glad, because I’m trying to clean and cook this food. So our schedule is not going to look like the regular podcast schedule. But that’s how StoryTimeForMoms happened and it just evolved into what I needed, what my sister needed. So if you look at our website, you’ll see the courses. Our courses are, of course, different. For example, one of the courses is why I can’t seem to get it together with my kid’s syndrome? Why is time running me instead of me running time? We have the wives. We have the parents in boot camp because this feels like a boot camp. Don’t you feel like you’re in a boot camp?

It’s still evolving. One of the things that I’m really passionate about because everything that you see there, everything that we’re about is because we’re either just coming out of the fire of it or we’re in the fire. So the one that’s next is “Winning the Heart of Your Daughter”. That’s where it started. And that’s my story. I’m sticking to it, and we’re rocking with it.

That is so awesome. I am hearing more and more stories where people are looking at themselves and their own experiences and saying this is an asset not a liability. But when you’re a young child, it’s more likely to feel like trauma when you have someone that’s close to you that’s going through something like cancer and not a time for celebration. How did you find your way to the light to be able to share it in this way?

Not just because she was my mom, but she really was there. I’m sure everybody’s going to say this about their mom, but she was very special, very, very special. She was very different in her own respect. Now, of course, I always tell the story as I speak on different platforms that I think I was grieving for maybe three years and didn’t even realize I was still grieving. It was so painful, so painful, to where you feel like you couldn’t even catch your breath. Then as my life was moving and I began to develop in ministry and different things that I was doing. I’m a former military person with a medical background. All of those things kind of drew me out. Because of the needs of other people. I found myself really talking to people about what it’s like to transition your parent as an adult. I don’t care what anybody says, it’s different. It’s different when you’re over 25, 27, 28 years old and you’re transitioning your parents. My parents died 36 months one after the other.

So when you ask me how did I get to that place, we’re still there. The classes and the courses are healing for us. Whenever we’re on the call with moms, we literally can feel her presence. We hear her conversation. We say some of the same things that she says. Every call we share with people, the slogan that she would say, “Sick or well, I’m going to work.” Well, those are the things that developed our work ethic. “Sick or well, I’m going to work.” So you would see her get up, having had chemotherapy the day before. She obtained several degrees all the way through. If she had a little more time, she probably would be a doctorate to this day. So that’s what we saw. She was one of the first black child life specialists in New York. Now that’s a popular thing. Back then it was not popular. She developed the wing in what was Interfaith Medical Center in New York. So when you say how did we, we’re still pushing.

How are you connecting the work that you are doing to interactions with your children? Are they the “living lab” and model for the curricula and workshops that you’re creating?

When I tell you we are in the fire of it, we’re conversing about everything on purpose. We’re at the dinner table. The news is on and we’re talking. When you have a son that you’re raising as a young adult and your conversations are different. For a while, I was in denial, like oh, I don’t have to talk to my son. He knows. But I had to say the words. I had to say, “Son, when you get in the car, take off your hood.” “Son, you cannot walk into the store like that.” It’s mind blowing. So when you say how are we bringing them in? Because we’re in the fire and because of just the lifestyle that we choose to live, you have got to think, we’re raising these young people and then the world is trying to raise them too.

We’re a little creative in our house. Yesterday, my husband is the music person, so they’re sitting there watching Verzuz together. I don’t know if you know about Jeezy and Gucci Mane, but I think it is amazing. They sit and he knows the words. They know the words. I mean, they’re three different generations in my house, but it’s that kind of thing that we do. Some people might say, “Oh, that’s redic.” No, it’s not. If you don’t know what they’re listening to, that’s a problem. But not only know what they’re listening to, but it means something to him, too. He’s yelling, “Oh my God. I know that.” And she’s like, “Oh my God, Dad.”